Gratitude * Sunday
Sunday’s heartfelt tradition.
A time to slow down, to reflect, to be grateful.
A list of gratitudes, our gratefulness feeds one another.
Quoted from Taryn Wilson
Joining the Gratitude Sunday Tradition at Wooly Moss Roots.
Soft warm sun, cool air,
yesterday brought gray clouds, rain.
Tomorrow? Who knows?
Three quarters of 2015 is gone as September is going out with a bang. Just days past the autumn equinox and here we are today with the fourth Blood Moon in a tetrad, full lunar eclipse, our world thrown into cosmic twitterpation, and many people affected by the power of the universe, some without even being aware what is happening.
I love the new word I learned – tetrad – and learning what it means. I’m hoping to see some of the eclipse tonight. To feel the light in the dark and honor the light and the dark in me. The dichotomy in all of us.
I love, which feels too strong, and I hate, which I hate. I am good, though never good enough, and I am bad, and never bad enough. I struggle and have little ease. I am easily struggled. My heart is full of love and acceptance of the divinity in the souls of people, my mouth and head full of derisive expletives when their behavior fails.
I can’t sleep and can’t get enough sleep. I awaken, and cannot stay awake. I see joy and see distress. I see so much right and too much wrong.
My life is full of stimulation, yet I function best in low sound and light. I control what I can but there is so much beyond my control.
I remember, re-live, and dream the past; I wonder about the future.
I plan and set goals, which disintegrate, disappear, or morph into fantasies. I go with the flow and miss opportunities.
I desire, yet bear disappointment when some desires are fulfilled. I am faithful and have faith in things I cannot see or prove, yet experience little sense of security or loyalty from others, and yet have hope that feeling is just a product of low self-esteem.
I work to the best of my ability at whatever task is at hand, but often do not enjoy it or wish to be a person of leisure who does not have to work at any task. When I have leisure time, I often choose to work, because it simply needs to be done.
I am older, questionably wiser, yet I carry the days and follies of my youth always inside me.
What life brings is strange, and yet divine. So much pain, and so much joy. Are they the same? Two sides of one coin? Two sides, left and right? Two directions, up and down, or forward and backward?
Tonight the moon is full, tomorrow it is not. The moon will be eclipsed, changing from light to dark and back again from one minute to the next. We experience only this moment now, but we trust there is another moment, another day, another moon, another month, another gift of time. Change is the only constant.
Tonight step outside in the early evening and take a look at the moon. Contemplate the change taking place in the moon, in our world, in your body and mind. Take your shoes and socks off and feel the earth beneath your feet. Breathe the fresh air and feel it on your skin. Feel your heart beat, your lungs inflate, the blood as it moves through your veins. Open your heart to the earth and what it provides, and the divine joy of being here this moment.
Color Watch – colorful attractions in my neighborhoods this week – a long lasting creamy white rose, which sometimes flower until first frost here in the Pacific Northwest; ten foot tall burgundy leaved fluffy puffs I don’t know the name of; swirl of greens with golden orange and red stemmed chard; last of the gold, pink, and cream honeysuckle; a tiny pretend birdhouse (too small for birds, maybe the right size for bees) wind chime in a sound garden at a local bookstore; you know how I love capturing critters, a ladybug upon a dry nearly spent thistle; a bee on early autumn’s still blooming lavender.
Current View – Wolf Hall, a six hour BBC production based on the novels by Hilary Mantel, about the career of Anne Boleyn in the court of Henry VIII; The Other Boleyn Girl, a BBC production based on the novel of the same name by Philippa Gregory, about the love between sisters Anne and Mary Boleyn and their competition for the affections of Henry VIII. Having watched Showtime’s production of The Tudors a couple of months ago, I realize I must be having an English history phase.
Currently Reading – Excavation (2014, memoir) by Wendy Ortiz; Secondhand (2000, fiction) by Michael Zadoorian; Shakespeare’s Wife (2009, history) by Germaine Greer. Yes, concurrently.
This week I have been grateful for:
- The flock of birds I see as I drive by so fast, descending from overhead wires to play and bathe in the water puddle beneath them next to a 50 mile an hour road. I am likely the only one who pays attention to them. I see and receive their joy of water.
- Finally being in a financial place where I can fill my gas tank as needed. I remember the days of scraping up 28 cents to put in just to limp the car home.
- The abundance of so many food choices in my full refrigerator, freezer, and cupboards, my guys complain they can’t decide what to eat.
- The soft angle of light and air of early autumn days when the sun is warm and the air is not hot.
- The dichotomy of nature and what a human (part of nature) can create.
- Keeping in mind that building up does not necessarily mean tearing down first.
- A friend who got to marry her heart’s love this weekend after many challenges getting there.
- Love, no matter how painful.
- The foibles of humans, particularly wild and crazy risk taking strangers, and being able to avoid some of the hurt by their carelessness and thoughtlessness.
- Finding relief from real life by reading fiction.
- Satisfying nosy curiosity by reading memoirs, biographies, and auto-biographies.
- The creative work of writers and film makers and theater producers.
- Writing, despite life and time challenges, a little every week.
- Avoiding a collision with the fastest squirrel in the neighborhood as he runs, mouth full of nut, toward my car and then away again.
- Celebrating Banned Books Week! Read a banned book. Start with the Bible, or the dictionary, or Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, or Beloved, or any Harry Potter. Or so many more. Read for yourself and don’t let other people tell you what to read.
Hoping you have a lovely week
Namaste. Peace. Blessings.
Floral ribbon border by Laurel Burch